Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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