Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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