i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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