ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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