i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
