Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
