i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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