why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
