I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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