Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
