Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
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