Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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