i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
