Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow

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(909): View more from California

It must have been true love

(604): View more from British Columbia

I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other

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(240): View more from Maryland

I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.

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(319): View more from Iowa

he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.

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(714): View more from California

So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.

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(773): View more from Illinois

Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.

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(518): View more from New York

How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm a delicate orchid of a man.

(574): View more from Indiana

Blossoming into a fierce dragon.

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