the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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