You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
