She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
