If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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