There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I pour the whiskey from now on
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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