I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
