She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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