Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
people are starting to question the shark bite story
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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