i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize