New invention idea: vibrating tampons
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
i think i have herpe
just one?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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