i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
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