we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
