he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Randomize
