Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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