Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize