First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
