id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
