Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize