he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
jump out the window naked night went bad
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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