Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
