i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
im six kinds of drunk right now
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Randomize
