How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
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