We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
We got so high we made milksteak
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
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