Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
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