Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Just high enough for therapy.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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