I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
