:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Randomize
