How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
