I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
