it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize