What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
