all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
