I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
