Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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