You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
