The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
